Saturday, November 06, 2010

To keep a close friend near my heart (SPC Matthew George)

I ordered a Memorial Bracelet for a very specific person and a very specific reason. I know most people order them for relatives, but I did it for somebody even more important. There are very few people who would consider Matt important or a big part of their lives, but even if I don't deserve to, I want to be one of them. Matt was killed in action on August 31, 2010 at the age of 22. I had known him since he was 17 (I was 21 at the time) and we were both working together at Kmart. He very quickly became the person that you could talk to. Even after I got promoted to his boss, he was still somebody I could lean on and be myself around. He'd helped me move, spent time with me during the holidays when I was all alone, and been a major support system in my life. Matt and I had a strange relationship. We were close friends. Almost like brother and sister at times (when he was married, I was the only one he talked to about it). Later it turned out that he, at least, was interested in more. After I moved back to MN we rarely talked, but when we did it was baring our souls. He came to visit me for his 21st birthday. While he was up here, he declared his love for me to everybody at the local bar. Think he could have told me first? He witnessed (and was instrumental in) my baby sister (2 days younger than him) meeting her now husband. I regret that he never knew that they were married.

While he was up here, I spurned his advance because I didn't see him as  mature enough. He even left without saying Goodbye to me. He gave me a call while he was in basic and proposed to me. Multiple times. Once he had gotten out, I really may have considered it. We lost touch in the year after he completed AIT. When I found out about his sacrifice, I was heartbroken and saddened. I regret not talking to him more, not being nicer, losing touch, and underrating him. Matthew George always wanted to be in the military on the front lines. He wanted to be somebody. To mean something. Well, even if he never knew it, he was somebody and he meant something to me. I pray that he knows how I feel and how proud I am of him. My punk made a difference!

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